by
Alfred W. Tatum
outside the black gate
where I once roamed
is the image that haunts me
an image that I hate
the green grass absorbs the death of a 30-year-old
the dirt becomes soiled again with blood dripping from his chest
my two-year-old nephew
asks about the sleeping man
he lays on the ground to imitate the corpse
surrounded by the police tape
I am struck by his innocent depiction of death
he remains motionless
before the cop yells to get him out of the crime scene
He weeps when hearing the thunderous voice
I weep too for my nephew and the thirty-year-old
connected for that brief moment by their poses
One breathing, the other breathless
I grab my nephew’s hand and walk him away from death
hoping the image quickly fades away
the image that continues to haunt me
clogging my…
everything
the devil didn’t even anticipate this
He’s ready to retire
before the summer starts
His most profitable season
Overdose
ReplyDeleteThis world is crazy, and 10.4 percent of them are just lazy, for people to make a little money they get out on these streets and make some stupid exchanges. Our people don’t realize how it’s affecting lives and most of all our little guys. See I know a child that’s only 12 he had to see his father be put into jail. Living with his mother was all he had but for some strange reason she was always sad. So, METH is what she took, and after that one time she was hooked. Experts say that it is impossible not to become addicted to crystal meth. A poor kid, born into the chaos of this mess.
Now this is where my story begins. Monte walked through the doors of his broken down house only to see his loving mama lying on the couch. With her mouth wide open, a sad look on her face, looking like she was trapped. The woman looked like she was dying. And Monte started to cry {Mama I need you how am I going to do this ma you are so stupid, you said you were off this stuff, I don’t think I can make it without you, you’re all I have what am I suppose to do?} But the child could see in his mothers face that she was already dying. And soon she would be forever lost and the pain would suddenly end. All he could do to help his mother was sit by her side, holding her the same way she held him when he was a little child, the ambulance he had called had been too late. And Monte sat there holding his mothers dead body. See all Mama had to do was lie on the couch, Monte did the working, cleaning, and occasionally he did the cooking. Mama didn’t have to worry about anything.
Monte started to hustle his money by selling candy and he stole shoes. But now what else is he to do and where is he to go. Now his mother was a whore so all she left was a few dollars and her last fix of Meth. He had no family that he knew and no one to depend on but himself. One day while walking through his hood, he met some boys that thought they were in and poor Monte got brought into the game. He was selling that stuff. The thug he had become suddenly was a never ending game of charades, because he would cry every night because of the thought; that the same drug he was selling to the kids his age was the same drug that made mama see her last day. The drug called Crystal Meth made a 12 year old child see the most horrible of all deaths. But again I ask, what is he to do, and where is he to go? He stayed in the trade more than he got paid. So after he got tired of being played he left that trade and stayed up state with a long lost aunt who had disowned him, because he was not to be born since he was the out come of a victimized rape. But she knew he had no other place to go or stay. How sad
{“In Loving Memory of Mama. How could you do this to me? I trusted you, how hard could it have been to stay a little while longer? Mom I told you trouble doesn’t last always. How could you decide to take the easy way out? I hated you for leaving me, but no matter how I feel or what I say you will always be in my heart. I will always remember the day you made me a man. So here I stand strong and bold praying to from my soul. And ma I hope you pray for my soul daily. I will always love you.}
His word exactly, from the tip of his tongue to the ink from my pen.
“These are the words Monte said”
Pounds
ReplyDelete6 pounds I weigh for the lifetimes that pass since my oceans crust stumbled
Every day of every year
The greater and greater my fear
The more and more the pain I feel of the drowning water falls
The huge water gates
The trappers of life
2 pounds I wear
For the lives I never got to say goodnight to
The dwindling twilight
The luminosity that diminishes
With the growing of every pound that I wear
230,000 pounds I bear
For every soul that slipped out the door and into the crack in the oceans floor
Tears discharge and enlarge
Because the enlarge to the size of a war
9 pounds of stones I carry
For the strength that rocked my scary
And provokes the cause of me being weary
And for the reason my joy is now seared
All the weight in the universe…
Minute to my pounds
So I walk and grumble cause of the weight of my pounds
And you will hear every sound
Ounces
In life he only gives us what we can bare
The pounds you wear on your shoulders are only there because you are aware.
Pounds to Ounces?
230,000 pounds to 3,680,000 ounces
Compare your ocean to life.
Broken, fractured, occupied, wide, flowing, in need of great help.
A test of strength
Who will prevail?
The one who carries the weight of the world on his back.
The one who is not afraid to admit, he cannot go on.
The one who knows the sound of his grumble,
Will be heard.
The ocean tells a story,
And he is glad you could understand his pain.
He can accept the pain.
But he still questions:
Is your 230,000 pounds more than my 3,680,000 ounces?
Or are they the same?
Read
ReplyDeleteRead read read
Come on max you can do it
I cant I told you that
All I read was “I saw it rain”
Not “I was in the rain”
Children snicker as the teacher shakes her head
Look at that idiot he cant even read
No, no I heard he was dyslexic
Dyslexic no he’s just plain stupid
I hang my head in shame
Why cant I be good in writing like everyone else
Math I’m great at and science is easy
But not reading class, luckily I have Ms. Johnson for help
Read read read
I bet they wouldn’t be laughing if they couldn’t read all the great books and comics
All I get from those things is incomprehensible words unknown to man
Gosh why do I attempt school It’s so stupid
Just like me something unneeded in the world.
Resilience
Look at me now
I’ve overcome my dyslexia
I did it all on my own, thanks to my resilience
Now I can read, don’t ask me for forgiveness
Don’t talk to me, don’t ask me for any daps
Matter of fact…
I should’ve punched you in your chaps.
For all of the pressure that you put on me
You’re not forgiven as far as I can see
I can read your whole persona and so far I read…
You’re are ignorant
Full of it
I found my way in and out
It seemed that I’ve triumphed without a doubt
Outnumbered
ReplyDeleteWe as African American men
Are outnumbered
By the so called superior
They call them selves higher educated
But us as blacks are not helping the cause
As not even half go on to college
Only 37 out of a 100
We are outnumbered by 18 more
We are outnumbered
By the superior yet again
4 out of 10
Have been in prison
Outnumbered again and again
Compared to the 2 of white men
These are the statistics
That is giving us a bad reputation
We are outnumbered
But this time by ourselves
Is it possible for us?
To outnumber ourselves
To have more in jail
Behind a cold cell
Than we do in college
Where they would be doing very well
We outnumbered our selves 3 to 1
These stats are definitely no fun
We need to pick up a book
Instead of picking up a gun
Now I know I will be 1 less person
To hurt our reputation
Resilience
It’s a cold rainy night.
A figure walks down his block he’s known for 17.
Black?
Yes.
Educated?
Yes.
Gun?
No.
Jail?
No.
College? Harvard?
Yes.
But it’s all taken from him.
That freaking gun.
Those stupid gangbangers.
Why him?
He thought as the bullet shattered his stomach, his soul, his spirit.
Eyes closed, he listened as the whispering flooded his ears.
A reassuring voice calmed him.
He opened his eyes.
Man.
Doctor.
He can’t go to Harvard.
People like guns more than a pencil.
They like jail more than school.
The numbers are great.
But what do they matter?
He gets up and sees himself.
Blood.
But it will not stop him.
Resilience
Boy
ReplyDeleteDear boy who appears weak yet is truly strong at heart
Dear boy who is seemingly left nothing but Satan’s gift, the dark
Dear boy whose hope was eaten as though by a shark
Dear boy whose future seams tart
Dear boy whose mind was blinded by the white dust by which his mama was persuaded to keep lying
Dear boy, throw away your sighing
Dear boy look at the luminaries at the corner of space’s dark
Dear boy I know you’re a king
Dear boy with motivation
Dear boy with anticipation
Dear boy who once gave a helping hand
Dear boy give it again, give it to your brothers and then the next man
Dear boy with no excuses
Dear boy with no moral pollution
Dear boy who allows no mental instability or intrusion
Dear boy at this point in your life span
Dear boy you are now, Dear Man…
My Sean Bell state of mind
ReplyDeleteBullets flyin
A dead body lyin
Funeral timin
Whole family cryin
Suit wit da crease on em
Dis story is a sad one
Da policemen dat killed em must have been mad ones
50 bullets below and above the belt
I wish dem policemen culd feel how his family felt
He didn’t deserve it
Im glad dat his murder got published
I say that becuz I think that blacks shuldnt be the ones getting punished
Them white folks will get u fucked up wit da law
Look at Mike Vick he went to jail for a long time for killin some dogs
5 police officers kill a black person don’t shit happen wit da law
I was just thinking in my head wat da fuck
Dey must be tryin tuh say dat dogs are more important den us
Dass why black people don’t like police now becuz dey lost our trust
Black Cop
Got on force
Now you the shit
Got on force
Now you cant hang
Got on the force now you tell yo buddies on the force I’m in a gang
Got on the force now I am a lame
Got on the force now you full of wealth
Got on the force now you to good to care about yo grandmamas health
Got on the force and messed up with yo big white boss
Got on the force and he reminded you that you a nigga
Got on the force and made me have to pull the trigga
Confused
ReplyDeleteConfused, confused I am so very…
Confused, if only I could have walked in your shoes.
Cousin, you left all of us, the family all so misconstrued.
In the dark on why you would choose.
Maybe you were as much as we are confused.
On what you felt you had to…
Ask you why is now something I can’t do.
But from the outside looking in you had us fooled.
It appeared you had more than you could use.
But I guess it was a smeared image you used to cover the truth.
The truth of you being lost without as much of a clue what to do.
I’m confused of why that gun was used.
Used with your finger through the loop.
Confused, confused I am so very…
Confused.
Understanding
I might be confused but did you ever find the answer
at the bottom of the barrel of that pistol.
I watched the wall that you built to hide how felt
painted with pictures of happiness.
You never allowed the paint to chip and show
what was really going on.
I might be confused but I do know 30,000
commit suicide each year but it only takes
one fast bullet to break the speed of sound
and change many lives.
B.A#12
ReplyDeleteDanger
From a former Olympic champion to the president of food,
While a Mexican politician is assassinated by fools
The longest serving senator is gone at 92.
Not a lot of people know this and yet it’s all in the news.
Left.
I mean if I could slam down the mallet of death
The juries ballets cant make the arrest.
The judge is stringed
Puppeteer fiends on the cover of news magazines
Government?
A 16 year-old male black republican
I’m elephant tusk
The demo isn’t tusker then us
They’re mere mortals
And I’ve entered the portal to revolution.
I see the lies and executed 85 on the night of the long knives
Swastika in my eyes
But I’m a popular guy says the blueprint.
Right.
Who knows the disease,
Or how a massive explosion can blow up 80 million trees?
Say cheese, smile for the camera.
It’s the American thing to do.
Craft a smile out of a vile twisted malicious pursuit, of money.
You’ve lived the drama, tagged with a hulk swagg
Incredible aint it? The green made us famous.
Now we styling with rich rags.
Custom made shoes but I walk no better
No further, no farther, no purpose so why bother?
And we could just do it, but ill stay with the X
They call it a swoosh but I’m looking at checks
The freedom of speech is censored.
Life was never simple.
Ancient underground geniuses giving thumbs up with a thimble
And to cover it up the money that’s under us.
Such a religious nation, in God we trust.
The suburbs be hell bent when they tear down the projects
The eagle just feeds on people using excuses like “progress”
Evolution is a process and this is not the first step.
Black people are not niggers.
Check the dictionary, it means ignorant does it not?
Man knowledge is scary it’s like ancestors in a plot.
Not really observed like contracts that curve words
But secret assassinations and set-ups are hard bargains.
That’s why I handle corporations with a Long sword and armor
And my shield never yields to dogmas
Everything is questionable.
Dangerous aren’t I?
B.A.#7
SAFETY
Safety is peace
Safety is something to share
Safety is rare
Safety is not ever where
Safety is where you can't be afraid
Safety is always in the shade
Safety is nothing to be ashamed
Safety is know as no danger
Safety is always good during the whether
Safety can be no injuries
Safety is a place with harmony
Safety is the action of keeping safe
Safety is home or a place
Safety is important
Safety has to be supported
Safety is good
Safety should be in the hood
Safety brings faith
Safety can come in all different shapes
Fat Man
ReplyDeleteSeptember 7, 1944,
He was born into the hands of mad men
Men
Hell-bent on revenge.
Fat Man was our enemy,
And enemy that we couldn’t stop,
No gun,
No army,
No person could stop him.
And on August 6, 1945 he hurt us all at our weakest
Bad
He struck down in my town
Like the hand of God
He vomited One million degrees in our faces
His big head eclipsed the sun,
Leaving us to burn in the cold heat.
He had taken away all my friends,
In a matter of seconds,
And in the years to come,
When he is gone
He’ll take away even more
We’ve done nothing to Fat Man,
Except lay on a silver platter for him,
And he had no problem eating.
Later we learned his son Little Boy had killed our neighbors to the north,
A wall of death trekked through them all,
One by one their faces blackened,
Dropped to the ground,
Their skin seared to the bone,
Looking like death himself.
Little Boy looked so much like his father
Faces sculpted by the angels of Heaven,
But was the devil in disguise.
We were the innocent,
But my leader lined us up on the chess board as pawns,
And we did our job well.
Our King started the game,
And the help’s Queen ended it.
Pool
ReplyDeleteAs his toes start to coil from making contact with
the cold water did he think about catching a cold.
As he lunges from the shallow end to the deep end
did he question himself if he brought a towel.
As the water rose from his waist to his chest did he wonder if the life guard
would tell him to stop splashing the water so hard as he swam.
As the water rose from his shoulders to his chin did he wonder how quickly he could reach the edge of the pool.
As the water rose to his nostrils and started to trickle down his lungs
did he realize it was late to scream for help.
In his final seconds, staring up at the surface of the water
did he think that his dark skin would support the statistic
that he was three times more likely to drown.
Life Guard
The football whistled through air above pool.
Look y’all somebody done drown in da pool.
Said, a small boy at the other end as he lifted up a four year old girls foot.
All nawl said my older cousin said as he and everyone tore ass when dey had a look.
I was stuck as her body was a float.
In front of me I couldn’t cope.
It took a moment but I woke.
I grabbed her only to feel her choke.
I laid her on deck and again I froze.
Then I remembered wat I seen on shows.
So now her chest I poked
And her mouth I blowed
Only to see colored mucus exit her nose
And her eyes start to roll.
Then once again I froze.
All of sudden feeling cold.
She was okay until they called.
The hospital said she was gone.